How to encourage independent play:

Struggling to get your kids to play by themselves? Well Momma, you are not alone. We’ve been there before too many times.

It is such a blessing when you can get your little one to play alone and you can get maybe a chore or two done.

Independent play is SO good for your kiddo, so it is a win win when we get our kids to play by themselves. Independent play is where their imagination can run wild and help them explore the world.
So let’s get into it! How do you get your kids to start playing on their own?

Set a Routine:

A routine for kids in general is crucial for kids in general but when encouraging independent play. You need to put it in your routine/schedule for independent.

We have a time block schedule, and I schedule it into our blocks for what I call free time. Which is just another way to say independent play. So my kids do know it’s scheduled portions of the day there is a time for them to just play.

Check timing

This one is just making sure that you’re giving your kids in age-appropriate amount of time to play. A five year old can play independently longer than an 18 month old.

The earlier you start them on independent play the better they’re going to be at it. My three-year-old is much better at playing by herself in my one year old is and that just comes with the territory of their age.

When trying to start your kids learning about independent play and how to independent play you need to remember how old they are and find times throughout your day to encourage independent play that are age-appropriate.

I would suggest just starting off in smaller time increments like 5-10 minutes for a one year-old. Or 10 to 20 minutes for a three-year-old.

Play With them

This one sounds a little counterproductive since were wanting them to play by themselves.

But kids do need you still we cannot expect them to play by themselves all day every day. They do need that connection with you, and see that you are a priority to them.

I make sure that I read to my girls every day and we play at least one game together or do an activity. I do try to get on the floor with the kids and I’ll play with them for about 10 minutes, and then I’ll let them know that they need to keep playing by themselves but mom needs to go do XYZ.

Sometimes they follow me but the more I have done this, the more they’ve stayed and played amongst themselves.

I’m not saying play with them for the entirety of white independent play, it’s just helpful when you’re starting out encouraging your kids to play independently that you do play with them for a little bit. And then step away and allow them to continue playing.

Connection

This one does go pretty hand-in-hand with playing with them first. If you spend some quality time connecting with your child they will do better with independent play.

This is why we block out some of our time every day for an activity or mom to play whatever game they want. I always make a point to spend one on one time with all of my kids at some point through the day. And read to them as well.

If you make the time to Connect with your child they will be healthier and happier in the long run and healthy and happy children will play independently.

It can be a lot of fun finding different ways to connect with your kids and finding out what they enjoy.

It’s important to find something different to connect with your kids with. My one year old loves to cook with me and help bake. So that’s something we do weekly.

My oldest loves to read which is why I make a point to sit down and read with her every day.

Don’t be afraid to get messy with it

Kids love to explore the world around them and get messy. I know as moms we want to clean up the mess. But it’s so good to sometimes let our kids make a mess.

Let them play in dirt. Set up a sensory bin that might be a little messy but you can wipe up.

Set them up with an art or craft that might involve maybe a little glitter or some thing.

Letting go of of the fear of letting your house or your kids get messy will help encourage them play independently. My kids LOVE to play in the dirt in our backyard. It means we get a bath at the end of every day, but they play in the dirt for a solid hour.

By letting them get dirty and doing activities that might make a mess we encourage them to explore their world and encourage independent play.

Toy rotation

This one is a big one. Kids off to get overwhelmed with how many toys they have how many options there are. You would think the more toys the more that they will play because they have so many options. Kids will get overstimulated with too many options.

I have a little blue bins that the kids toys go in and I will swap one of those bins out every week. I also will take certain toys that I noticed they are not playing with and put them in my closet. In about a month I might bring them back out and it’s like a whole new toy again and my kids will go off and play with that toy.

Even though they didn’t play with this toy a month ago and now they haven’t seen it for a month it becomes a whole new thing almost like Christmas morning. And they will play independently with that “new” toy.

Set the example:

Kids learn by watching you. You are the best example to your children that they are going to have.

By modeling independent time for just you it will encourage them to do that for themselves as well. My kids see me take time to journal, to read my Bible and every once in a while I read my Fiction books while they’re awake, or I’ll do a puzzle.

I want to see me taking time independently of them and doing something. By doing this it shows to them that it’s time to do independently. Obviously if the kids are rowdy it’s harder to do that, but I still try every day to model the behavior of independent “play” for me.

Conclusion

By adding these tips and tricks in to your life you will encourage your kids to play independently. Obviously the duration will get longer is their older and the more that you do encourage independent play. You can take a look at my blog post about time blocking to see when I do schedule in independent play/free time for the kids.

It doesn’t happen overnight, be calm and patient if your kid is new to playing independently. They are just kids they will pick it up quickly I promise.

Children’s imaginations are wonderful things and should be encouraged. As a mom independent play is crucial for me and getting things done throughout the house. I start encouraging independent play pretty much is soon as the kids can sit up.

So just stick with it you got this mama it’s gonna be awesome!